Proof of Sock

The internet is slow today - it is as hot and cross as I am, as everyone is.  I'm at work alone because I told everyone to leave when they hit their personal heat limit. They made it to 10, which I thought was good, really good in fact.

The chocolates that live on my desk are not quite melted but neither are they quite solid.  A delicious texture in fact, except that the environment that created this state is the one we all have to sit in and semi-solid people are less delicious. Which is to say the air conditioner done broke, and this is a building built in a technologically dependent age.   No airflow. 

And even so, it is a million degrees out.  Airflow would only make the poaching well ventilated and breezy.  My ear keeps waiting for the shimmering vibration of cicadas, which I associate with this temperature on some kind of visceral level.  It must not be a cicada season, though I swear they were all cicada summers when I was small.

The nice man is out sweating behind the building.  I brought him some ice water in a cup - which was weird, I'm so used to bottles but a cup is what I had.  It felt old fashioned, bringing the repairman some water in a cup.  I wish it had been a beer, but I don't keep beer at work.

Yesterday I went medieval on my kitchen - someone asked me how my house can be the mess I always talk about, with just me and the cat (who totally does her share of mess creating, little shedding beast).  The truth is I hate house work AND I never learned to do it well and efficiently.   There is an art to it, or a knack at least, and a discipline:  I am the daughter of a born-again slob who was the daughter of a dyed-in-the-fucking-wool psychotic neat freak (related items, I think) and I am not saying this is my mom's fault because am 39 and take care of my own business.  But I am sort of realizing that since I did not learn these habits at my mama's knee I have to teach them to myself and that the cat hair is not going to vacuum itself, no matter how much I wish it would.

Typically I do the bare minimum to keep it civilized.  But I think my minimum standard for civilization is changing and I'm tired of feeling like I have to clean up for company.  I like clean, it makes the house feel calm and good and me too.  So my choices seem to be get over myself, or dust more and I am aiming for both - if I could average out my mother and grandmother I might turn out have a fairly balanced approach, in this one area at least.  But to get there, there has to be a higher level of clean attained.  A new baseline.

Plus, I want to paint everything in my house and thatgoes way better when you start without a layer of weird, sticky baseboard dust.  Not that these were conscious decisions - I woke up yesterday and went down to make some breakfast and accidentally scrubbed the baseboards and vacuumed the screens and and washed the windows inside and out and stuff, for oh, like 10 hours.   I went behind the cookbooks, people.   With a vacuum and THEN a dust rag, and did all that odd chore stuff too, like polishing the silver fork wind chime, and taking down the brackets for the blinds I deep-sixed 4 years ago and removing the holder for the paper towels I don't use. 
The kitchen looks a million times better with the screens down and the glass clean - LIGHT!  VIEW!   It's kinda crazy nice.  Satisfying. 

I think the trick is, clean the shit out of one room, then the next day, clean it again (which only takes 10 seconds because it is already good) THEN clean the shit out of the next room.  Day 3 do rooms A and B, then clean the shit out of C.    And eventually you can keep the whole thing going on a hour a day (A thought both horrifying and appealing.  But I think the Internet can probably spare me a hour a day, right?).  Except I am going out of town Wednesday and when I get home?   Brace yourself for home improvement: I had one of those spasms I get sometimes and 1050 linear feet of new book shelf are on the way here. 

Tonight I corral yarn and hang up the laundry.  Maybe a bit of dusting.  We'll see what happens to 'a higher level of basic civilization' over the rest of the summer.  The whole thing would be simpler if I just shaved the cat though.  Well, simpler except for the plastic surgery to repair the damage.

Oh god, I blogged about housework, didn't I? 

It is the heat, forgive me.

 

I HAVE started the second one.  But it goes really slowly when you spend a weekend with a brush attachment in one hand and a dust rag in the other.

Oh PS.  I talked to my brother yesterday and every two seconds he had to go pry his two year old daughter off of something she wasn't supposed to be into or renegotiate the terms of some thing or another.  She's a twinkling, button-pushing, ferociously stubborn pack of trouble that one, and it makes me incredibly happy because a) she's a riot and b) so was he, the rat, 35 years ago and serious big sister was target no. 1.  Also hearing my brother repeat as his calming mantra "well behaved women seldom make history" was like, the best thing ever. 

(he's an awesome dad, just so you know.)

Comments

[Ruth]

I *heart* girls like your niece. They make the best grown-ups.

[Jan]

I totally agree with you on the theory of housework. Other people may view my house as kinda messy but to me it is my creativity taking hold. Apparently a jumbled house is a sign of an artistic nature. I do clean (just to set the record straight) but have never got a handle on the keeping it tidy stuff.
How can anyone create if they tidy all their yarns and half completed projects neatly in a drawer all the time?
I hope that you don't mind but I did post a link to your blog from mine as I totally agree with your housework strategy.

[Donna]

A big hello from Oz! Have just found your blog; have not been living under a rock but under three kids. Glad to hear that someone else cleans like me i.e keeps the house just this side of the health dept. Might be easier without my daughters here-can I send them to you for a month? Your brother's mantra will now become mine as I struggle not to maim Misses 3, 7 and 9.

[Jocelyn]

Just had to say, how come all of your amazing visits with famous and artistic and prolific knitting types never makes the oxy news bulletins? Cause honestly, that's GOT to be more interesting and important than what they actually write about.

[Shannon]

If you're getting new bookshelves forget cleaning for a while. Having just done it I am indulging my inner librarian and rearranging all the books (LOTS) in the house. Most fun....and I even got rid of some! And found a whole lot I need to read this summer!

[natashapixie]

I completely understand the changing base level of housewreck comfort. I have consistently lived in disarray for most of my life and have recently had unexpected urges to clean and organize. Today after getting onto the internet in a cunning attempt to procrastinate aforesaid urges, I happened upon your blog about housework and it has inspired me to rally myself and continue the battle against the tide of clutter. Thanks for the eerily appropriate blog/ much needed motivation.

[Kathy]

It must be a time of year thing, or phase of the moon, because I'm suddenly finding myself cleaning things that have been nasty grubby forever. I do try to let these moods have control because almost all year round, I clean just barely enough to survive.

Thanks for making me laugh along with you, and for giving me appreciation for our un-seasonably cold weather here in Alberta. I'm wearing a shawl, but my chocolate is solid.

[Ellen in Conn]

Buy a Roomba, and cat hair will be all eaten up.

[Karin]

Hi, I find www.flylady.net helpful in learning to take care of my home, maybe you can have a peek and see if it might work for you?

Karin

[chessie]

Last year my longish-haired cats got so matted they had to have "little lion" cuts. Once I got over the initial shock, they looked kinda cute. This year they got preventative cuts, so they'll feel cooler and not get mats in the first place. By Fall they will have grown out again. Fear not!

[Katie]

You lost me at "baseboards."
:-)
I, too, am the daughter of a born-again slob. And, although I like my house clean, after years of forcing the cleaning myself and hating every minute of it, I realized I have no desire to change. I broke down and hired a cleaning lady. And yes, I have my cats shaved. They LOVE it.

[auntiemichal]

PS: In Portland, Oregon, we're having record cold weather, with days not even getting as high as 6o F. Some folks are still turning the furnace on or burning their wood stoves. I'm not kidding. I have my mitts, slippers over wool socks, and sweaters on! I hear Seattle is likewise cold.

[auntiemichal]

Thank you for your thoughtful and insightful post. I too have cat(s) and housework issues, but my recently acquired Roomba vacuum has proved a "good thing." I blogged about it, and since then have been turning it on regularly to catch fur, fleece, and dust mice. "He" needs to be cleaned up after each use, but its more like playing with a new tech toy than work. LOL He's been invited to Taco Night at a friend's house to do a demo. BTW, nice sock!

[Heidi]

I also hate house work but since I found Flylady.com things are much better. She's got a great way to help de clutter and keep the place clean and happy. It's not a quick fix but a long term process.
Love the socks.
Isnt it fun to see what kids do to your brothers? My brother was a bully but his kids have sure made him into a better person.

[kelli ann]

well behaved women seldom make history. i love that.

[caroline]

chica, those are some cute toes you got there, hehe.
and btw, my old roommate DID use a hair trimmer to give a buzz cut to his cat to lessen the shedding. It looked a bit funny but did seriously work. and the housecleaning? give yourself the best present ever in the history of the world and get a cleaning person in there to deep clean every two weeks. It feels like Christmas and New Year's all in one when every time you come home after s/he's been there.

[Daniele]

I too hate housework. The only person that I ever learned from was my ex-mother-in-law, believe it or not. She doesn't like me very well (you know, ruining her son's life and all...), but she was stearn about cleaning behind the kitchen sink (you know, where it gets wet and the soap is cruddy, etc.). For some reason, I can't wash the dishes without cleaning the back of the sink. Thanks ma.... Plus, I got lucky in my second marriage (somewhat, but I digress...). My present husband vacuums, cleans the bathroom, etc. I am now officially the person who sits on the couch and has to raise HER feet while trying to watch t.v. and wishing HE would just shut that damn thing off! :)

On another note, I finally did it Juno. I started a blog. Come visit me at mscreate.typepad.com.

[Marin]

Oh, the tyranny of the vacuum attachment... Do you feel all grown up when you clean? I'm not much of a housekeeper myself, so every time I clean of my own volition, I feel very grown up, like I made a wise and informed decision or something.

Hey, even if you don't, you got clean. And a really good sock.

[Jessica]

Lovely sock (that you would never knit ;))! And yes, the major job of blasting away the grime and clutter is tough, but if you can maintain (despite the help of our shedding furry friends or, in my case, boys who grew up military and apparently didn't get the clean gene), it's a wonderful thing. Of course, this heat kind of belays the maintenance of anything but a cool drink in one's hand...

[Lynn]

Huh. I'm having the same thoughts, although I have yet to act on them. I am SICK AND TIRED of living in a house that really needs painting inside and out, that is covered in cat hair (two, short haired, shedding like banshees in this heat, poor critters), with grime everywhere, a sweaty toilet, and a male-type person who does not see dirt. Fun times. I think I'll start by throwing out the male-type person. He doesn't knit or spin, so not useful or fun at all.

[Bookish Wendy]

Dude. I think it should go Room A, Room B, come clean Wendy's house. Rinse Repeat.

[lanea]

Good luck! It's a big job, and just seems never to stay done, which really pisses me off. The never-ending remodel has ruined all order and cleanliness in my house, and it is making me twitch. I have--don't laugh--even considered using some of my terribly limited vacation time to beat the house back into submission.

[Stephanie]

I am cleaning too. Guess why?

[Lizbon]

Drat. I meant to say: I love clean; I hate cleaning.

[Lizbon]

"...and semi-solid people are less delicious" - Man, every time you post there is some phrase like that that just knocks me on my ass with delight.

I have to admit, though, that reading about all this industrious cleansing really makes me wish for a maid.

I love; I hate cleaning. Especially vacuuming. Gak. Give me a toilet bowl any day.

Also, I admire your pink sock. The more because my own First Sock is sitting in the knitting basket having a time-out until I can get over my disappointment at having somehow fracked up the toe. It needs ripping and reknitting, but as I ;ack any basic knowledge of what went wrong or how to fix it, well, hence the time-out.